Kids’ behavior evolves along with their growth and development. Having knowledge of what your children are going through in their development will help you better comprehend their actions and attitudes.
When dealing with children, you can use this information to avoid threatening, shouting, or having a breakdown yourself. It’s not about punishing or becoming angry; discipline is about teaching and leading your children.
Simply said, it’s a means to teach children right from wrong while ensuring their safety.
Strategies to discipline your children effectively
Set Consequences
When parents and children have open lines of communication, discipline is more effective. Make sure your child is aware of what you expect of them, in other words. Set consequences and rules for breaking those rules.
When your child goes beyond the boundaries you’ve set for him, enforce the punishments you’ve given him. Parents should make this a priority for their children as early as possible.
Keep in mind that youngsters who aren’t taught the importance of boundaries and regulations may have difficulty integrating into society as adults. If you’re going overboard, keep it under control.
As a parent, it’s counter-productive to threaten to ground your child for a month for every minor mistake. This is because it will erode trust and lead to feelings of resentment.
Although warning your child that if they don’t behave, you will turn off the television or take away their iPad, you should follow through regardless of what tantrums or stink they throw later.
As the child ages, the consequences become more severe. Punishment should remain age-and transgression-appropriate at all times.
It is easier for youngsters to anticipate the consequences of their actions if there is a corresponding natural reaction. As a result, the repercussions of violating the regulation have already been decided upon. Negotiating, shouting, nagging, and arguing are no longer necessary thanks to this method of communication.
It also removes you as the “bad guy,” as your child made the decision to receive the punishment, not you.
The following is an explanation of how it all works:
- Keep the consequences out of the conversation. Your child will learn by experiencing the consequences.
- Ensure you reward each conduct or action with a fair and adequate punishment.
- You may gently remind the child of the rule he has broken and the consequences that will result if it is not followed.
- Your child is learning to put their faith in your word with each punishment they receive.
- Once again, quietly and without lecturing, take the appropriate action.
- There are no surprises if your child is informed of the rules in advance. Consistency is all that you need.
- Remember that he chose this result by refusing to comply.
- Rather than receiving punishment, your child will learn to perform what you expect of him.
- Make sure everyone in the family knows the new ground rules and the ramifications of breaching them.
- If your youngster protests the repercussions, avoid engaging with them. It’s all you have to do to calmly inform your child that they had a choice whether or not to follow the rule, and they chose the latter.
- Determine the consequences for bad behavior at a family meeting.
Offer forgiveness and reconciliation
It’s time to begin recovery once they’ve realized how they’ve harmed the relationship. Teach your children to ask for a pardon. Give them a second chance by asking for their forgiveness and reassuring them that everything is okay now. Teach the other child how to forgive their sibling if they are at odds.
Teach Them to Communicate
The sooner you teach your child to identify and express their feelings, the better off they will be. A child’s frustration and subsequent disobedience can be due to the fact that they are unable to express themselves verbally.
Love should carry the day
Make it a habit to always approach your children with love. This will help alleviate any tension that may be building up in the relationship. Realizing that your child’s future choices are not a reflection of how good or horrible a mother you are will go a long way toward easing this anxiety.
Regardless of the circumstances, you must show your children that you care and will do everything in your power for their success. However, in the end, their decisions are their own.
Give them attention
Children’s outbursts are often motivated by a need for your attention. So, if you see positive behavior, reward it and show your appreciation. Tell them you notice and appreciate what they’re doing. On the other hand, if your child is misbehaving, you may want to consider ignoring them.
A lack of attention from you can help your child’s bad conduct if they are not doing anything harmful to themselves or others (provided that you balance this out with lots of positive attention elsewhere). Your child cries out for your attention, so make sure you provide it to them.
Meaningful words
As soon as your child understands the significance of your words, they will begin to behave. If you don’t bicker and quarrel with them and stop repeating yourself, they will realize that you mean what you say when you don’t create a scene.
If you continuously tell your children to do something but nothing occurs, and if they don’t, they will lose interest. The problem arises because they’ll lose interest if you keep nagging at them to do something.
Make your words count the first time.
- Get to the point without wasting time shouting, arguing, or bartering.
- Then, if necessary, carry out your plan.
- Clearly express what you mean, and if necessary, set a consequence.
Be Consistent
You risk undermining any disciplinary measures you might take if you aren’t consistent. Your child needs a strong foundation of self-discipline to be an acceptable and appropriate adult, which these strategies aim to provide. Consistency, on the other hand, is essential if you want to build a solid foundation.
Avoid Toxic Words
Stress hormones rise when a child is yelled at or shamed, leading to changes in the child’s brain structure. Harsh verbal discipline can harm your child’s behavior and mental health, even if you are a warm and nurturing parent.
We’re all human, after all, and we say things we don’t mean when we’re angry or frustrated. To be on the safe side, it’s best to use encouraging language while dealing with children.
Avoid Double Punishments
If your little one gets into trouble at school and receives a punishment, allow that to be their punishment instead of punishing them yourself. Do not subject her to a second sentence for the same offense at home. The school has dealt with this.
If your child’s behavior demands a discussion, help them think of new ways to deal with the situation. The same “crime” does not necessitate a second sentence.
Use the right Timing
When your child is upset, it is impossible to discipline them effectively. The words you say won’t get through to a child having a tantrum or sobbing uncontrollably. You should never discuss behavior until you both calm down. As a result, be selective about the time you choose.
Disciplining your child shouldn’t happen in front of others, especially close friends and family. Make sure that you and your child are alone when discussing their actions. That’s only fair, right? Exactly. Using humiliation as a form of punishment does not work.
Have open communication with the child
You can create goodwill by creating an environment where children can freely express their thoughts and feelings. Everyone needs to know that they are being listened to. Regardless of whether you agree with your child, listening to what they have to say is always beneficial.
However, you need not agree with them or make any changes due to their efforts. All they want to know is that you paid attention.
Conclusion
Discipline is not about punishing children, but rather changing their behavior. Instilling self-discipline in children helps them grow up to be emotionally and socially mature adults.
Disciplinary methods will always be controversial, but there are many effective ways for parents to teach and guide their children.