Spanking isn’t an effective form of punishment, despite the fact that it may seem like the only way to get a child’s attention at the moment. Rather, it is the act of lashing out at kids and inflicting scars that extend far beyond the physical.
According to the findings of numerous studies, hitting children can lead to increased danger of mental health issues, antisocial behavior, and aggression in the future.
Spanking is also unhelpful when developing an attachment with your young child. Children can only do well if they completely trust their parents and feel safe when they are around them.
Learning the risks of spanking, as well as some safe alternatives and knowing when to get help if you can’t control your anger, is crucial to grasping the gravity of this situation.
Reasons that spanking your child is not Ok
To want to spank is just human. This form of discipline is common among today’s parents. The reason is so many of them experienced it while growing up.
Although almost all professionals concur that spanking is useless and detrimental to a child’s social, psychological, and physical development, it is nonetheless widely practiced. The following are reasons why spanking is not ok.
Spanking is a violent act.
Spanking is the worst kind of bullying. It’s the kind of conduct no one wants to see repeated on the playground. Those who experienced this as children are more prone to using physical force in later life, both with their peers and their own offspring.
Damages child’s sense of self-worth
A child’s morale and self-esteem can take a serious hit when you use spanking. As a result, it can strain parent-child ties.
Spanking children does not teach
When you hit, you ruin any chance you had of teaching coping mechanisms. When you spank, you take away the chance to teach your child healthy ways to deal with bad feelings.
Missing the point
Children who go through spanking may avoid engaging in an action. This is because they fear the penalty, but this does not mean they have learned to manage their impulses.
When you slap your child, all you’re teaching them is that certain actions will result in punishment, not right from wrong.
Injuries can occur.
This is especially true when the abuser is already angry and has little control over their behavior. However, administering a spanking after the act gives the impression of being ruthlessly intended. Spanking while shaking a child is more brutal. It can cause catastrophic injury to their eyes and brain.
The reasons behind spanking
Parents resort to spanking their kids when they’ve exhausted all other options. A parent’s patience can wear thin when their child consistently acts out. They may wonder what they can do to change the situation. The phrase “nothing else appears to work” comes up frequently among parents in these scenarios.
Spanking may seem like the only option in the absence of a more systematic approach to discipline. Spanking is not only unproductive but also harmful to a child’s growth. A spanking might change a child’s behavior for a short time, but it usually doesn’t help in the long run.
Parents often smack out of anger, impulse, or frustration. An angry parent might slap their child without giving it any thought.
A parent may resort to slapping as the first line of defense if they lack other methods of correcting their child’s behavior. Spank your child all you want, but it won’t teach them anything useful or fix the problem.
Many parents who hit their children later come to regret doing so. Long-term harm to the parent-child bond can also result from spanking.
When disciplining your child, try these strategies:
Give your child a choice instead of repeatedly saying no, which can escalate a fight. “Do you want a blue or a red shirt?” returns the agency to your kid. This could prompt an immediate behavioral shift.
Commend the positive.
This involves using positive reinforcement, such as a reward or praise, to foster the desired action. Do your best to catch your kids being good on a regular basis, such as when they go to bed or put away without complaining.
Pause for a moment
Can’t stand to wait any longer? Put the child in a secure area and leave the room. You can calm down and prevent yourself from hitting your child if you take some time out, briefly away from your child.
Get some help now!
It takes no courage to seek assistance. If you’re about to lose it and need time to collect yourself, ask your significant other or a trusted friend to “spot” you. And that you’ll do the same for them if they’re ever in your shoes.
Allow a brief pause.
All you need is some time to relax in the shade. Set a timer and have your child sit in a peaceful place. If your child runs away, have them come back and try again, but disregard any temper tantrums they throw.
Everyone struggles to exercise self-control at times. Seek professional assistance if you find yourself unable to control the temptation to spank. The use of an object to strike with or the act of spanking while under the influence of alcohol or drugs both increases the risk of injury.
If you or your partner’s hitting is frequent or severe enough to leave a mark or bruise, you should get help immediately.
Don’t assume that your child’s care giver share your views on physical punishment. Teachers, relatives, and sitters should never physically discipline a child. If you fear your child was hit, take urgent action to correct the situation.
Though it’s normal to feel the urge to spank, especially when you’re at your wit’s end as a parent, it’s essential to remember the risks involved.
Do everything you can to find healthier ways to deal with your own stress and anger instead of spanking your kids. Doing this will give you a far better chance of having a peaceful home life.